A Way

It's pretty warm today. I guess I've been riding the bike for at least five hours now, but I've reached where I wanted to be. Col des Aravis. From here on it's all downhill so I can chill here for a while, enjoy some coffee and cigarettes, and the view. Isn't it bad for your lungs? I've never seen a cyclists smoking. Who told you I was a cyclist? I'm just cycling. And stop bitching about cigarettes and just listen to the cow orchestra. The music coming from the bells of a thousand cows. Do you know why they have those bells? I don't really know but must be for protection against predators.
What predators?
You know, wolves and such. Do you think the music scares them? I think that makes sense. Makes them think there is something bigger than them. Do you think wolves are that stupid? I would have guessed that over time they would learn how it's all a human trick. Well, none of that matters now. They are all dead. Wolves are all dead? Yeah, look at these wild mountains. They look so wild, so untamed, so natural but you can't find anything in there that can kill a man. How about the cold, the storms and the wind? That, they can't control yet. But the rest is gotten rid of.
So why the bells?

Must be for the tourists. An espresso for three euros. It's okay, I don't get it every day. It's nice to spoil yourself everyone in a while. So, where to from here? I guess I'll camp somewhere on the road to Chamonix. I can't ride much longer today. And how much longer can you keep doing this? What do you mean this? I mean this- this thing you're doing. Escaping. As long as it takes. The guy is chasing me, I can feel his heavy breath on my neck. I won't let him get me. Maybe he's already got you. Good for him then. I'll still cause trouble. I won't be a wolf in his mountains. I'll be a fox-steal his chickens, eggs, whatever I find. I'll adapt and survive. That's what the wolves did wrong. They were too rigid. I will be elastic. Wolves tried being elastic as well. They are called dogs now. Same is happening to foxes nowadays. YouTube is full of pet fox videos. Then I'll guess I'll find a different way to be me. Good luck.

Cruelty

I've always felt like these biker dudes are like our big brothers. Just because they also ride on two wheels? That must be the most stupid thing you've said so far. No. The way they salute you with a head gesture and how they look so big in those protective clothes. It's like something were to happen to me, they would be there. And when they see me on a bicycle, I sense that they somehow envy, and feel proud of me. Oh yeah. You may have a point there. They are like much more mature versions of me. They can afford to buy a motocycle and gas, but not the time needed to ride it. That's why they need to be fast. I? I can ride as slow as the fuck I want. Is that why you're so slow today?
Storm is coming. Can you smell the wood burning? Smell? I can even hear it.
Then you better step it up.
Well I'm trying my best you fucking asshole. I'm riding uphill and upwind. No more sugar in my blood.
You got any more of those bars?
No, they were finished last week.
Well you should have had a better breakfast then. Stop finding excuses. You better finish the road before the storm arrives.
How do you know its close? Look at the clouds, genius. They were like that yesterday as well. It's not a sign of anything. Just how the mountains are. Oh well, I also checked the forecast. It says it's gonna start pouring around 14. Okay that's not good. I still trust science.
Then fucking push the pedals!
Okay, can you just stop shouting? I can't think when you're so loud.
Why do you need to think? The less blood goes to your brain the better.
Don't push me. I need a break. My muscles are all dead.
Stop riding and you'll be as well.
Oh, what a great motivation- like I'd care.
Go ahead then. Stop.
I can't stop in the middle of a climb. I need to reach a flat area first.
Do you still smell the woods? Yeah. I wonder what's going on in those houses. Or chalets. Whatever the hell that means.
They are cooking. Getting ready for lunch. Something you'll never have. The best you can have is some bread and peanut butter. And maybe a beer if you're lucky!
Beer is good enough, thanks.
Have at it, if you can afford.
How much more do I need to ride?
Let me ask science.
Okay, it says ten kilometers more to the peak. Then you'll ride downhill for seven kilometers but then another climb starts.
I'm fucking tired. My legs don't work anymore.
I feel you. My legs as well, you know.
Can't we just hitch a hike?
Why would we?
Cuz we weak?
No, I don't accept that. Speak for yourself you cry baby.
Ouch.
Come on. First Col des Montets, then Col de la Forclaz and after that it's all downhill. You can reach Lausanne in one day. Then you can be with her.
No, I can't.
Oh yeah, right. I remember now. Well, maybe one last time you can see her.
No dude, just stop it. She doesn't want, and I'm tired.
How many kilometers left? Eight. Okay. At least I have water. You'll have plenty of it if you don't rush.
I said don't push me.
Somebody has to. Okay then I guess it's better that you be the one.
Remember the guy you met after Geneva? How did it work out for you? He pushed you so hard and disap-peared without a sign.
I still think it was you.
Keep thinking.
He was exactly like you, man.
Thick moustache, a great Surly bike, and killer leg muscles. Remember he told us he started from Stras-bourg at night and reached Geneva in hours? The place where I spent days to get to.
But man, after meeting him on the road I was so inspired. Without him I would definitely take more breaks or even quit and spend the night somewhere before Annecy. It's because of him I was able to reach Annecy that day.
But what do you say about him disappearing just before you reach the lake? How can you explain that?
That's why I thought I was you.
I would never disappear like that.
I've seen you disappear before.
It was long ago, I am a different person now. You can trust me.
Yeah, that’s what they all say.
Two kilometers left.
Do you remember the first moment you touched her?
Remember? I can still feel her legs.
Were you really as shy as she told you?
I don't know bro. You know how it is. I just couldn't look her in the eye.
Will you call her when you get back in town?
I hope I will.
I hope you won't.

Can't we think about something else?
Yes sir! What would you like to think about this beautiful day? You fucking moron. It's not up to you what you think. I decide when you think, I decide what you think, and I decide who you think about.
Yes... Yes, I understand. But can’t you just pity me on this climb at least? You know it's hard. Can't I just sing? You sing when it's all good. When things are hard and slow - you think.
♪ There is a house in Chamonix
Stop it. Say her name. Dimitra.
Write a poem for her now. Do I have to? No. But it's for passing time.

A little bird all alone
Searching for a higher ground
And a lone wolf who's been
watching her all along

Now sing this until you reach the top.
Oh, you cruel, cruel man.
I wish it was over.

Clichè

Hey. Wanna hear a cliché? Shoot it.
Happiness is the road.
Amen, brother.
It was so much better when I didn’t focus on the destination. Just riding, for the sake of riding. And now that I almost reached the goal, I don’t want to ride anymore.
Yeah I get it. Can’t blame you. But you always need a goal to start riding. That’s why I always choose an impossible one so that I may never reach and be on its way forever.
Love is the road.
Remember your high school love?
You “loved” her for years, just being on her road without trying to “get”. You were always riding but never getting closer. Then she had to come closer and fuck everything up.
-Want to be your girl, she says. Who the fuck needs that? I was happy dreaming.
So now what?
Oh well, I’ll be in Chamonix today. Probably stay there a couple days, then leave.
The way back home is the worst.
Don’t you miss your bed? Not really. I miss some other stuff.
Like her smell. Or smile.
Oh, that goddamn laugh brought so much joy to my life.

♪ If I was to walk away
From you my love
Would I laugh again?

Stop singing sad songs now. Weather’s fine, road is clear. Sing something else.
♪ Closer - closer
lean on me now, lean on me now.

Oh for fucks sake! Don’t you know any happy songs?

♪ Oh baby baby It’s a wild world
Okay, nice. I’ll take it.

♪ it’s hard to get by
Just upon a smile

... I give up. It’s your day, your victory, your big achievement. Sing whatever you want. I can’t help you if you don’t let me help you.
Who invited you? Leave if you want. Better for me.
If I leave, you’ll die.
Please, leave now.